giants in the light

Last Tuesday

2012-01-28T22:18:00.002-07:00

This was inspired by Youth Lagoon's Afternoon. And some pre-game excitement.

Chairlift

2012-01-28T22:14:00.002-07:00

I loved this band first a few years ago when I heard their single, Bruises.

Now, here is their latest, I Belong in Your Arms. Love.

p.s. They're coming to Boston March 26th. Already got some tickets for this happiness.

All the Single Ladies

2012-01-22T20:12:00.002-07:00

For all the single ladies out there - and the ones were used to be one. Here's a good laugh. Have a great week!

Indoor Soccer League

2012-01-20T17:40:00.003-07:00

Our first game was this past Tuesday. It was exciting lacing up soccer shoes after much struggling to properly fit into some new shin guards. I haven't really played soccer since high school which is over a decade ago. I have never really been able to use over-a-decade-ago comfortably without harking back to the days when I probably peed/pooed my pants but I am doing a lot these days I guess (using the phrase over-a-decade-ago NOT soiling myself, just for the record).

And since it has been so long since I played soccer, I could feel that old Kristin creeping back in: the shy one who felt insecure in her own skin and had her hands close to her face when she wasn't wildly running away from neighbors' dogs. So, I wasn't as enthusiastic as I had envisioned, at first. It took some kicking the ball around, shaking hands with new people/teammates and a collision with a guy from the other team before I was back to a more true version of the girl who likes competition and accidentally slips field-appropriate expletives. It was cool, thrilling even.

I've been wanting to play soccer lately and this indoor soccer league idea has been mulling about in my head for some time now. I feel like the New Year's Resolutions/Monthly Challenge mind set has proven successful in other aspects of my life. I've even toyed with the idea of continuing my no-shopping challenge for January into February. I may suspend it for the week I'm in Hawaii. I mean really, it would be most cruel of myself to restrict shopping in paradise but for what it's worth, I'll probably be too busy napping on the beach, swimming in the ocean and hanging loose to be bothered. Anyway, I just couldn't be more pleased with being on a soccer league. I really missed being a part of a sports' team. If you're in South Boston any Tuesday night the next five weeks, come to B.A.C. for a match - we might needs some subs.

It's January 10th

2012-01-10T16:03:00.006-07:00

Ten days into the new year. Le sigh. Le happy. Le purr.

A quick update on my no-shopping: It's going grand and I have done some nice "window" online shopping. I inspired a teacher at work to make the same challenge although she decided to go for the whole year! Kudos, LC, kudos!

In other more important news: I have a NEW NIECE! (Congrats to S. and H.! - my brother's first bebeh.) She is the most beautiful thing I have seen in a long time. I found out via text that little baby Green was born a perfect size and a perfect weight. I wasn't expecting to feel so attached to her but I must confess that when I saw her picture, I stared at it long, allowing those tender feelings to swell. We've already had our first Skype conversation even though she just grunted and other stuff that newborn babies do; eat, glance furtively from side to side. It didn't matter what she did I could stare at her for hours and be thoroughly entertained. Sheesh, what a hold little babies have on our heart strings!

Here's a picture of the lovely lady Heidi I lifted from FB, compliments of her new parents.

Twitter

2012-01-03T09:51:00.003-07:00

As if I needed another social media niche to deposit my energies and time. (Follow me on Twitter if you're my real friend! - Jokes.)

The truth is, I don't need it. None of us need it but since many social media platforms have begun to emerge, the space has been created! Now that we have that space it's hard to imagine a time and a place when we didn't have it. We're becoming increasingly independent with our communication and isolated from other people through these avenues. Isn't that one of the many paradoxes of life? The more we try to network, the more isolated it can be/feel. Who hasn't felt some twinge of jealousy surfing friends' Facebook photos and have entertained the thought that your life isn't as exciting? This is just a small example of the isolation that can occur within social media. We're connected in cyberspace but real-life connections seem almost obsolete. I do crave the real-life and physical presence of good people in my life even if it's short and rare. We need it.

Then there's Twitter. Unlike Facebook, Twitter provides me the disillusionment that I am friends/close acquaintances with famous people. I follow them and can reply to their Tweets and Tweet about them and maybe, who knows..., they'll Retweet my Tweets! I actually enjoy Twitter (Twitter-pated) much to my better judgment that my time can be better used chasing other pursuits (fine-tuning my violin skills, writing a novel, volunteering, etc. - I could do both though, right?)

The fact is, I like communicating and the new way that this generation communicates. I feel nostalgic for the days when the family phone rang and we didn't know who it was and I would dreamed that it was my school crush Nathan on the other side. I miss the days when lying about a phone call could guarantee me the best seat in front of the TV. I miss the days of getting letters in the mail with hand written notes and real photographs. Yes, the communication was less convenient and slower but it got the job done. I like the new way we communicate now. I like them both and yes there are advantages and disadvantages in both, too.

The advantages of communication now is that I feel as though our voices have a larger stage from which to present. Our influence can reach a wider audience and in turn we can be similarly influenced. There are so many ways in which to present, too. Youtube has provided me hours of entertainment. Lately it has become popular to have a Youtube video where you communicate via notecards and facial expressions with background music; thus, providing a 'voice' for painful truths too difficult to say out loud. There are some powerful videos like that out there.

I'm impressed with humankind and our ability to find ways to communicate. Yes, I could use my energies elsewhere instead of all the social media alcoves. And, they don't need to be isolating if we can do it right. It's not necessarily necessary :) But, it's another way to speak and hear voices, my own and others. And that my friends is what tightens bonds, deepens relationships, encourages positivity, inspires change and probably a bunch of other good stuff.

2011, a year in review: some firsts and seconds

2012-01-02T12:27:00.004-07:00

Firsts:

Sprint Triathlon

Trip to the Virgin Islands

My own classroom

Real Job with Health Insurance

Trip to San Francisco

Trip to the Adirondacks

Corn dog

Shingles

Wisdom Tooth extraction

M.Ed Portfolio from hell

Seconds:

Master’s Degree

Sweaty, sticky Boston Summer

The Sounds concert

Posing as Posh Spice in a lip sync

Losing a dear grandparent

Missing a dear grandparent’s funeral

Too Many to Counts:

Colonoscopy

Visits with Fam in NY, PA, UT

Bubble Teas

Lasts:

Master's Degree

Hopes for 2012:

Live positively and productively with a smile on my face!

Leave my 20s with a kick a** party and enter the 30s the same.

Maybe to be a car owner - never been one (you're welcome Mother Nature, love you too!)

2012, the year of monthly goals

2012-01-01T19:25:00.002-07:00

My brother has been doing monthly goals with his wife in 2011 and he only shared this bit of good news with me a few days ago. December was throwing something away every day (This could also mean some recycling). I think November was lactose-free month. One month was to go without sugar, too.

Now, these monthly challenges are also daily goals - short term and somewhat manageable. I have already decided that January is no-shopping month. I am of course excluding the food and house items that are necessities. I am talking about the Amazon app shopping and the Target app shopping and all the other online shopping I have become addicted to. All this in addition to going to the mall on pay day.

So, day 1 - here we are!
I shared my plan and current challenge with a friend at church this morning who actually gave herself this same goal but for an entire year. A year! Yes, an entire year without shopping for shoes, clothes, perfumes, etc. I was duly impressed and inspired that if she can do it for a year, I can do it for a month. (Let's be honest, I'm already in mourning about doing it for a month. January is pretty crap with its dismal weather, short days, long nights, and otherwise depressing aura of nothingness. This is the month when shopping comes close to becoming a necessity for sanity's sake. I'm just trying to paint a picture here, it is a sacrifice.)

If any of you out there have any ideas for upcoming month challenges, I'd be up for hearing. I don't have enough for this year yet.

In Utah for Christmas

2011-12-28T22:17:00.002-07:00

It's your atypical Christmas in Utah with no snow, sunny skies and only a light jacket. I'm loving it.

Christmas morning was also an atypical one in the Green family. With 12+ in the family, only 3 were there to open gifts Christmas morn with the blazing hot sun beating down and melting the candles on the piano. When I say three, I mean only Ma, Pa and myself. I've grown accustomed to sharing my parents with 9 other siblings so their undivided attention was rare. Around 3 o'clock more siblings joined the festivities of lounging on the couch wrapped in a blanket reading/falling asleep/reading/falling asleep again. We sang songs, ate food, played games and otherwise had a very jolly time. This, I thought to myself, was why I came home to Utah for Christmas - to be surrounded by the people I love and who love me. The people who find me somewhat amusing and cute and won't judge me too harshly. I like these people and I value the time we have together.

I also value the time I have to sleep in until noon-ish and have dreams of flying that I can gently wake from. No alarm clock is set. Breakfast can be a piece of pumpkin or pecan pie (with a dollop of whipped cream). Naps in the middle of the day if I feel like are an option, too. All in all. Christmas has been nice and continues to be so. I also get to see friends I rarely see. It may be brief but it's always time well spent, even if we already know what's happening in each other's lives because of Facebook and blogging, real-life catch up trumps all.

It's going to be hard to get back to work and bid a holiday vacation goodbye. (Especially the staying-up-late and sleeping-in-late part --- I mean a loving family and sweet friends part) I still have a few days left, soaking it on up!

Happy Birthday to a Christmas Miracle

2011-12-22T07:38:00.004-07:00

An ode to my sister Natalie Green on her birthday.

She never shaved her legs when we were younger,
or her armpits for that matter.
It grew so thick like a patch of animal fur.
Until one day a Mary Kay lady had her
wrapped around her corporate claws
and signed her up without a pause.
Natty and her Mary Kay.

A 5th grader with cancer of the bone,
Natty, my hero was bald and frail.
Despite her talents and skills she could not hone
stuck between two hospital bed rails.
She lives today, boom hey!
Singing songs and praising the day.
Lead singer of Pony of Good Tidings.

Natalie, my older/younger soul friend
A surgery gone by, a side effect celebration
With a solid sistership that'll never end
A Christmas miracle, mysterious lactation.
A buddy, a therapist, a partner in crime
All the memories, cherished good times.
Natalie Renae Green.

Christmas Spirit

2011-12-14T20:44:00.001-07:00

This was good news.

The Chinatown haircut

2011-12-01T18:19:00.004-07:00

In all its hideousness.

I hate profile pictures of myself and this one makes me want to vomit. So...for H who wanted pics. Here you go. Edward Scissorhands could've done better. I'll never forget you S.F. Chinatown periphery, thanks for nothing.

San Fran

2011-11-27T14:06:00.003-07:00

Last weekend was spent in San Francisco. First time! It was so lovely. It started out a little rocky after I thought it was a good idea to get a haircut at a random salon near Chinatown. I thought it would be fine, it wasn't. I was given monkey bangs and a long party in the back mullet - heavy and un-layered. Note to self: don't get too absorbed in Sexiest Man Alive People magazine. Not good for self. Not good for hair.

The food is amazing in the bay area. I was never disappointed. Even by donuts at 1am - freshly baked to perfection. Also went to the Sounds concert which was fun. We found ourselves in the mosh pit where limbs were nearly torn off by the mayhem. The lead singer had to ask the crowd to settle down and not be so violent. Really.

The Golden Gate bridge is fantastic, too. I really have nothing bad to say about the place. Except that Fisherman's Wharf clam chowder is kept at a lukewarm temp. But that is all. Even got to tour Pixar - a very informative and knowledgeable tour by one of the shaders. Did you know there's such a thing as a 3-D printer? And that Pixar has a cereal wall (with fridge full of all kinds of milk)? No wonder Disney paid billions for Pixar, it's where dreams come true.

Full on The Hunger Games

2011-11-22T20:25:00.003-07:00

To put it more appropriately, my eyes are extremely fatigued from The Hunger Games. Suzanne Collins, who would've thought your trilogy would be so compelling. I read the first book in 3 days. It could have been less but any spare moment off of work was occupied by a book in my face. Now I'm almost 100 pages into the second book, Catching Fire.

I've noticed how popular the books have become and have resisted buying into it (literally) but when the library waiting list slots me at 126th person in line for a turn to read the series, a purchase or two (or three) is necessary. I'm also feeling quite smart by avoiding it till now. I don't have to wait for months for the next book to come out. I can voraciously consume one book after another in a instantly gratifying sort of way. Remember Harry Potter? Yes, we all waited for that next book to come out. Good thing I put that to rest for years, now I can do the same thing with those.

One of the few disadvantages of this approach is the toll this reading is going to take on my eyes. The burning sensation is dissipating but let's face it. Once it abates, I'm right back to the book. And losing sleep in the process.

Picture of Health

2011-11-16T16:44:00.004-07:00

It has been so long now, I don't even know what it feels like to be healthy. The bygone days of clear nasal passages and non-rashy skin...sigh.

Tea has become my best friend along with Ricola and watching TV in bed.

On my way to S.F. now for some good times and a hopefully voice that sounds like me! (Seriously, I have had a prepubescent teen's voice for about a week now.)

In other news Shingles are almost gone!

Parks and Recreation

2011-11-10T14:10:00.004-07:00

Or just Parks n Rec if you're a real fan.

Anyway, this dream boat is lovable Andy Dwyer in the show. I could never date "Andy" in real life, for obvious reasons. But I shall dream of him nonetheless. I will dream of the real thing, Chris Pratt, if I must. If you haven't jumped on this bandwagon, now is the time to start.

I've also been getting into Up All Night. Will Arnett, guys - need I say more?

K, if I do need to put in one last plug: watch Mr. Bob's Toddler Kaleidoscope episode.

It's just a rash

2011-11-03T16:35:00.002-06:00

Or so I thought. I waited a few days too many before I finally succumbed to the sage advice of going to the doctor. But, at that point - there's nothing I wanted more than to run full speed ahead to a health care provider.

I got Shingles.

No, I'm not over 60 years of age. But I guess some stress and weakened immune-system can do it. It's not the funnest I've had this week but I had a chance to listen to this. Love it.

Feeling like Robin Hood

2011-10-21T12:11:00.005-06:00

But in looks only. Or, in accessories only.

I was holding a bow and arrow in my hand and feeling quite proud, regal even. When I expertly released and let the arrow fly, then was I acutely aware of 'feeling' and 'being''s differences. I used to be pretty good at archery. Those were my thoughts but quite unfounded on any real skill. It's like when I stand next to someone who's 6' tall, at least. "Oh, we're the same size". Are my perceptions so off?

Clearly.

First time, I struck an arrow in soft mud. Second time, arrow hits bale of hay (rejoicing on my end). Third time, arrow can't be found. Man goes looking for it, female Robin Hood impersonator walks away sullenly.

I'll be back to you bow and arrows, I will conquer you at some point.

Meanwhile, I'm using my new MacBook Pro! (Thus commence fraudulent feelings of being a pro.)

Rat Face

2011-10-17T16:09:00.001-06:00

My favorite facial expression.

You're welcome.

Hi, I'm a Mormon

2011-10-16T13:29:00.005-06:00

I'm a Mormon, just like the lead singer of The Killers and oh, so many more people.

This video made me love Brandon Flowers even more than I already do. The song (Crossfires) he's singing in the video reminds me of a New England Autumn - I listened to it hiking Mount Major in N.H. last year and it rocked my world.

Another thing that rocks my world is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I went to church today and go every Sunday. I also have the amazing opportunity to be a Gospel Essentials teacher. Every Sunday we talk about the foundational principles of the gospel. If you want to know more, go to this link. And come to church here.

Remember when I got an F+?

2011-10-14T21:23:00.004-06:00

Remember when I got an F+ in one of my classes at King's College London? Oh, maybe you've forgotten because I've now become so wildly successful and exude an A+ air of got-er-done! Whatever it is that needs to be git done, I done did it. Oh yes, that ol' shameful past is, well, in the past.

A family member recently reminded me of this F+. (For some reason families have a knack for remembering each other's poor choices slash poor performance - gotta love 'em for it). It almost destroyed me when I opened the dusty brown envelope with the unholy truth. I will say that I felt heaps better when I found out that 40% of the class failed with a solid F. At least my F wasn't condemnable (as they told me). They really know how to assuage a girl's fears of failure.

Anyway, I had this saying that I pitched to some students: "It is better to have tried and failed than to have never tried at all". I really appreciated their responses and insight into always trying and giving life your all because hey, if you fail, at least you tried and learned something in the process. Amen. I try a lot of things and though I don't feel I necessarily fail/succeed, at least I'm Doing.

So, my thought for this day, this past week, month: do stuff. Don't sit idly by resisting the Doing bug that might pinch your lazy couch potato self (believe me, I have a difficult time sacrificing my TV/Nachos/on-occasion-Nap medly. I love that time. But I also love the time of doing. Perhaps even more.

My ode to another of life's strange paradoxes, which is, the more energy you expend - the more energy you get. At least for me. I feel energized when working. Except when I'm in the Doing mode on less than 6 hours of sleep. I need a sturdy 7 hours to squeak by.

Meanwhile, I don't feel bad about the F+, I'm a little proud of it because it is my only F. I'm so glad it's not a boring, stand-alone-tasteless F. It's an F-plus! A you-failed-but-in-style stamp of almost approval. A grade I got trying the best I knew how (I guess the English/UK system didn't exactly agree). That's what we do though, do the best that we know how. The next day I went into my professor's office for a tutorial on the British-system-of-writing-a-decent-paper-you-American-fool.

P.S. Try not to examine split ends during the tutorial. The professor won't like it and he won't feel bad telling you so. Trust me on this.

My first corndog

2011-10-08T09:34:00.005-06:00

Last night I frequented the oldest fair in the country: Topsfield fair. First time I ever saw a pig race: yes, little pygmy pigs racing towards an Oreo cookie. So cute. It was fabulous! The best part besides watching chicks hatch was the fact that I found a $20 bill on the ground.

Quick story: I initially found a $1 bill as we exited the fairgrounds. I was stoked and told my friend that one time when I worked at a Japanese restaurant I found a $20 when we were closing up (extra tip!). As we made our way to the car I looked down and saw another folded up bill. It looked like it was going to be more than a $1 note. "Is this? Yes. Oh my goooosh!" Unwrapped in my hands I jumped up and down screaming. A man in a car by the side of the road rolled down his window and informed me that he had just dropped a $20 bill. "Whatever man! It's mine" was my reply. We smiled and both laughed as I skipped off gleefully.

Arrested Development

2011-10-02T19:23:00.003-06:00

It has happened!

Another season of Arrested Development prior to a movie is in the works. The new season will showcase what's been going on these past five years with each of the blessed characters. The new season will set things up quite nicely for the subsequent movie. So they say anyway.

This makes me less angry at Two and a Half Men, the show that premiered the same year as Arrested yet somehow has continued to thrive for 8 years and still going strong. (May I echo what I read in magazine article a year ago that also found this fact disturbing - "America, what is wrong with you!?") Now that Charlie Sheen has been axed, Ashton Kutcher apparently is meant to save the day with his handsome, boyish good looks. I've already decided I won't be there to see it. I know where my allegiances lie, with GOB, Mrs. Featherbottom, and Franklin. And.

Anyway, back to the Bluth family. Finally! After such a long absence of making do with the reruns. Also, chasing the swirling rumors that a movie was in the works these past five years has been inconclusive. So, here's hoping it's really going to happen this time. I already have the suspicion that it's going to be good. Very good.

happiness

2011-09-30T20:39:00.002-06:00

from today:

bike ride to Walden.
Friday.
Autumn smells and colors.
steak.
and friends dining together.

Missing from the happiness list:
BYU Football - it's just disappointing to watch.

Staring at a blank screen

2011-09-18T19:15:00.002-06:00

I was so excited to blog and now that I've pulled up the screen, I couldn't think of why I was so excited to blog.

Oh yes! I bought a printer and set up the wireless connection. Oh what joy filled my heart when I printed from my laptop while in bed with the printer in the other room happily clicking with activity. Now, I want to print everything and anything. (Maybe I'll print this blog post!)

Well, that's it, I guess. I'm aware that this is kind of a lame blogpost but having a printer is a big deal for me.

What would make this post even better is mentioning that I printed off the memories that I received from my family for my birthday. My dad emails all the sibs and asks for all of us to write a memory for whoever's birthday it is that week. Then on our birthday, my dad emails us a file of all the memories he received. I didn't think I would be as emotional about the memories as I was. I cried enough for my mascara to drip down my face. They were happy tears, of course.

So, thanks HP printer for providing me the hard copy version of some awesome memories of road tripping it on up in Ireland, eating a birthday cake in a cloth diaper and being petrified of my own pet dog. Though, those memories live on whether they are printed in ink or not.

And so it begins...

2011-09-16T16:31:00.005-06:00

First full week of school is done, and dare I admit that I'm having fun? Yes. I will own up to it.
And to quote something that has meant a lot to me since I heard it a few days ago:

If you follow Him, He will take you place you would not
go.

I don't always understand what I do, even though I'm the one living my life, my life doesn't always make sense. I end up in places I wouldn't have thought of going or being in previously. So, here's to God making things awesome. xoxo

Kee Kar Lau

2011-09-08T18:56:00.002-06:00

The name of a chinese take-out restaurant down the street that has become the object of my gastronomy fantasies. An oxymoron you might think?! Chinese take-out and the seductive art of good eating mentioned in the same sentence? Perhaps, maybe...

Yes!

I said it.

Kee Kar Lau.

I said it again, and part of my obsession is the way the name sounds when I say it on an empty stomach.

Happy

2011-09-06T18:38:00.002-06:00

Birthday!!!!

Here are some of the folks after dinner. We're holding our bubble tea from Boston Tea Stop. Amazing treats folks. Your taste buds will thank you. And age begets my double chin. Much to my dismay.

Close encounters

2011-09-04T15:04:00.002-06:00

Word of caution: don't wear a black sweater at night while taking a walk.

This was my first mistake. I became incognito once I donned the black cape otherwise known as plain-black-sweater-I found-on-the-street-in-London-two-years-ago. We were both trotting along Concord street quite happily. I crossed the street and noticed this car coming out of the right corner of my eye. I kept walking thinking that the Stop sign would do the trick. Well, the driver man's face was looking at traffic on Concord possibly waiting for a break in the flow of cars so he could peel out in his nice light blue Lexus. Yes, I know what kind of car it was because it almost hit me.

When I realized he wasn't going to stop, I was too far into the road. I jumped back in time to miss the front of the car but was right at his window. I thought for sure he had seen me then, turns out he didn't. I was somewhat rattled so I started banging on his window with both heels of my hands. I startled him pretty good and even more so when I yelled, "You almost ran me over dude!"

He put up both hands and defensively said, "I didn't see you!" Mmm, he was only looking at cars and I was wearing black equals notgoodness. I went East Coast on him and hit the back of his car as he accelerated onto Concord while shouting, "Look where you're going next time!"

That same night some old guy with a droopy face got up in my grille: "You're my special sister, ok? Have a nice evening."

At least some still notice a special sister when they see one!

Teacher glow?

2011-08-31T11:53:00.003-06:00

I'm celebrating the last day of my 28th year by decorating my classroom and dropping over one hundred bones on school supplies! K1 and I excitedly pushed an increasingly heavy shopping cart around Staples looking at papers, binders, pens and pencils. Yes, this kind of thing gives me energy. I. Love. School supplies!

I was holding a fountain drink in one hand and maneuvering the cart with the other when I came upon this little girl who was blocking me from furthering my gleeful journey through the store. She had huge brown eyes and pigtails. Her mom was standing next to her and they were just...awkwardly standing there. At first, it felt creepy as we all three stared back and forth in thick silence.

I was smiling but as silence wore on my smile waned, ever so slightly. The mother piped in and timidly asked, "My daughter wants to know if you're a teacher?" (How did she know?!)

"Yes, I am!" I squeaked.

The girl smiled and just stared at me. It was so cute. She asked if I taught Kindergarten (my cherubic face and easy laughter could have tipped her off - either that or my Fanta Strawberry mixed with Dr. P 'stache). We chatted for awhile, turns out she's going into 5th grade and starts school next week, like me.

When we parted ways, her mother thanked me, "for all you do as a teacher".

Thank you sweet strangers!

K1 offered that I must have that teacher glow. I haven't showered yet today. I was wearing a pair of old jeans and I was sweating through a shirt with paint on it. The glow slash force must be strong. Yes, very strong.

Post Tropical Storm

2011-08-28T20:46:00.002-06:00

Irene came in to New England and meowed like a soft, baby kitten. Church was canceled for no reason except for me to lazily pass the day away grazing in the kitchen and watching old 30 Rock episodes.

And, I was posting pictures from my holiday in the Adirondacks on my flickr account.

Check it out HERE!

Hurricane Irene

2011-08-27T14:32:00.006-06:00

The 'eye' of the storm is swirling somewhere over the Carolinas right now but the gnarly edges of Irene are already dumping down on Boston. The lightly splattered droplets on the pavement have turned into a gushing downpour. The anticipated winds are still miles away. I'm listening to podcasts, eating chips and salsa and waiting for church to be canceled.

On the radio yesterday, Gov. Deval Patrick and President Obama gave warnings and urgings that we do all that we can do to be safe. I hear that Manhattan residents are moving to higher ground (party on the top floor?). Coastal residents are fleeing inland after boarding up windows. Boat owners are packing up and shipping out a few weeks early. Store managers are gleefully double checking their store totals as food, flashlights, batteries, blankets, water, etc are being purchased at an alarming rate.

And then there's one of my roommate's who decided to take a mini vacation to the Cape. I simultaneously admire and pity her decision to throw caution to the wind to personally shake hands with Hurricane Irene. She sent me a text yesterday saying she had her SLR camera and that it was "going to be awesome" (that is if she lives to tell the tale). However, I recently recieved word that she's "still alive".

Go ahead, face your fears, face the tropical storm! If it's anything like Chris Farley's El Nino, I'm glad she brought the SLR.

Dad

2011-08-26T15:18:00.003-06:00

For those of you who read the previous post about Catch Phrase. This picture is of me and my dad moments prior to the chaos.

My last dinner at home before I flew back to Boston was a lovely one. We had Wiener Schnitzel for dinner and Peach Bliss for dessert. I instructed the family members present that we are going to start a tradition of going around the table and saying something nice about the birthday girl or boy. It's my mom's birthday next week but since we already did that on Mother's Day I said we had to say something nice about me. (I'm always looking for ways for people to praise me and massage my ego.)

It was nice. My dad, who I tickle and pester mercilessly, said that I make him laugh more than anyone else. And, that I have preposterous amounts of joie de vivre. He added while shaking his head, "But you don't have joie de vivre in the morning".

He's right and he had recently acquired plenty of first hand experience as we played racquetball with Annie every morning I was home. Racquetball perfectly meshes my morning tiredness with my pulsing competitiveness. Dad may have still been reeling from the bruises I gave him each morning. What a champ he is because before I used to beat him, I would beat him by 'accidentally' hitting him in the back with the ball.

There is definitely no joie de vivre going down on the racquetball court. I don't mess around. Ask my dad's bruises.

Games

2011-08-20T12:48:00.002-06:00

Last night, my family played Catch Phrase.

We have never played this game before (as far as my memory serves) so we were all fairly excited to start. I haven't always been the most enthusiastic gamer so I sometimes bow out when the games are being pulled out of the cupboard. As a kid I sometimes toyed with the idea that I wasn't really a Green because of this flaw of mine. But, my family LOVES playing games. L. O. V. E. Love with special emphasis. For some inexplicable reason, I was joining in - perhaps even a little eagerly. I guess I just wanted to be close to the people I love, sacrifices had to be made.

The Green family often plays Boggle, Trivial Pursuit, Scrabble, Scene It, Cranium, etc...into the wee hours of the night. I think this fact is attributed to the competitive streak healthily coursing through our veins.

My oldest sister Erin rallied the troops and started yelling the directions as if we are all hard of hearing. That's another thing that we Green's like to do. We like to set our voices at very high decibel levels. I believe this is because we try to out-scream the other so we can be heard and hopefully understood. If there was any type of game to exploit this family weakness-slash-strength, Catch Phrase would be it.

It started out well enough. Boys against girls (with Sara being an honorary 'boy'). Erin starts us off so my nephew Dylan will be last since he's the most confused from the hasty directions given. It starts off quite calmly as we guess Erin's phrase with hardly a hiccup. Girls' team 1 is feeling good. Honorary boy Sara has a difficult time articulating and keeps pushing next which makes what was a simple little beeping sound rage towards a quick, high-pitched beeping sound.

I can tell it's killing my dad, Jonny cakes sitting next to me because he starts rubbing his temples. With the beeping blaring nice and loud, Sara successfully passes and hands me the machine. I get through OK and hurriedly hand it over to my dad who is about to pass out already before he has even begun. The beeping at this point is more like a sustained squeal. I peer over my dad's shoulder and catch sight of the word, Kiera Knightley. He starts emitting thinking sounds that are hardly audible over the beeps. "Um, uh, uh, oh!" All the boys plus Sara are all leaning forward squinting their eyes hoping for something that actually makes sense. "She's in Little Women!" dad shouts. "Winona Ryder!" Sara gleefully screams. Dad even more disappointed starts shaking his head no. I try and help, "Where is she from? Tell them where she's from Dad!" Well, it didn't go well and the buzzer went off before her could get more out than what he previously said.

We became increasingly agitated and on edge. Some phrases were easy while others were hard, really hard. And, we were continually trying to instruct each other on how to do it or what to say. The Entertainment category was a nightmare for my dad. After we tested them all, we figured that the Food category was our strongest suit. Dylan did pretty well with the Government category. For Sarah Palin he said, "she's ridiculous" and that was enough.

The worst was when I had the phrase Log Off. I thought it was easy. My girl team looked at me with confused faces while the boys' team was laughing hysterically. They got it with my first clue. So, I began to scream louder and more frantically than ever. My mom who is also not into games (so that's where I get it!) comes running in to see what was going on. I went from describing poo (poo logs, I know!) to describing cutting down a branch from a tree, "with what floating in a river?!?!" My mom was in stitches. I was so close to having my entire body on the table while I continued to scream: over the beeping, over the boys' team's laughter, my mom's cackles, my own team's futile attempts. "Turn off!" "Half tree!" "Restart?" "Switch off!" "What the hell is up with this tree now?!" "Branch!"

The buzzer goes off and we're still screaming back and forth.

"It's LOG OFF!!! It's LOG OFF!! You're all so dumb! You're so stupid! I can't believe the other team had it before you idiots!!"

After I finish the set off with this rant (some of what I said has been omitted) we decide to end the game and start a puzzle.

From the Adirondacks to Utah

2011-08-18T14:12:00.002-06:00

Pictures to come. I drove a car with a brake problem (almost crashed a few times). Swam in a crystal clear lake. Ate goodly food and read books. The sun is shining now in lovely Utah with family and friends nearby. If only I had a kazoo to accompany the dancing/music and melee of living it up.

For the love of history

2011-08-07T15:54:00.002-06:00

If you haven't read anything by Nathaniel Philbrick yet, remedy it post haste.

Is it because I now live in Massachusetts that I find reading about American history so fascinating as I walk along the same roads they did hundreds of years ago? Last week's Sunday drive took us to Concord, MA where we just so happened to stumble onto the spot where "the shot that was heard around the world" was fired. I wanted to stay longer but I was hungry and mosquitoes were in abundance.

I finished reading In the Heart of the Sea by Philbrick that recounts the tale of the whaleship Essex (the inspiration behind Herman Melville's Moby Dick). Like my sister said, it was exciting with a capital E! I am now a few pages into Mayflower. Already I can tell I'm going to love it. I used to turn my nose at history, especiallyAmerican, so I'm grateful for this change of heart. Also, I visited Plymouth (and the 'rock') for the first time a few weeks ago and it was pretty pathetic. The main thoroughfare is full of annoying tourist traps and over-priced ice cream shops. "There's gotta be a lot more than just this," I thought. "A lot more!"

So.
I'm binging on reading. I can't stop nor do I wan't to.

Tunes when it rains

2011-07-30T10:15:00.004-06:00

While it drizzled rain yesterday, I found myself listening to a lot of Mazzy Star and The National. I tend to gravitate to the more sedate, perhaps even melancholy, tunes when it rains. And since blogging is for sharing, I share this goodie from The National. For those who are in the Boston area, feel free to join me Friday Sept. 9th for The National's show at the Pavilion. I suspect much happy laughter and swaying-to-the-beat shimmying will take place.

p.s. The National has plenty of upbeat songs, too. Like this one.

A bee and a bicycle

2011-07-29T12:38:00.004-06:00

Besides being preoccupied with work and reading two books a week, I go to the gym. I was proud of myself for getting back into it this week. While I was biking back home I felt a pinch on my bum. A bee had crawled into my shorts and stung me good. Impulsively, I squished the bee between my fingers as hard as I could as the pinching venom squirreled its way deeper into my cheek. Last time I was stung was when I was 8 years old so my days were definitely numbered. The pain had also vanished from memory but came back with stinging clarity.

Is it weird to experience some hesitation before hopping back on my bike again? Also, as much as I don't like the things, I have decided to wear cycling shorts whenever I ride from now on for a sting-free guarantee.

It shouldn't be surprising either that it hurts to sit down.

In other news, I went to The Flaming Lips show on Wednesday. It was a non-stop parade of dancers stressed as characters from The Wizard of Oz, streamers and confetti spewing all over the audience, and flashy lights including the frequent use of strobe lights. I have to say it was pretty awesome especially when the lead singer crowd surfed in a plastic bubble. I was supporting his ankle with one hand! The multiple Dorothys, Tin Mans, Cowardly Lions and Scarecrows spontaneously jumping about on stage was perplexing. They never stopped dancing, even during more sedate songs, and permanent grins pasted their faces... We commented on it briefly but were possibly more distracted by humongous balloons floating around the pavillion.

I have come to the conclusion that society's status quo clings to the strange, the creepy, the over-the-top zany. Lady GaGa's most recent video, The Edge of Glory, only confirms this conclusion. I bet she will look back at that video one day and feel some type of awkwardness (or she may experience that discomfort now, as I do). I figure that it will compare to the same kind of awkwardness I feel when I look back at my high school yearbook pictures (only magnify that by disproportionate amounts).

There's absolutely nothing awkward or shameful when getting stung in the bum, especially when you have to have someone else extract the stinger while you are still sweaty and out of breath because you can't do it yourself.

to want/to need

2011-07-20T17:04:00.004-06:00

There's a white spot on the tip of my left forefinger. It looks ashy and feels like a fire slowly burning out. The match, meant to kill a stink, struck between the side of the match jacket and my forefinger. I literally ignited a match on my skin. I have been soaking it for two hours+ till former taut skin has become wrinkly, prune skin. Yeah, I've moaned a bit. It's hot and humid and gross.

Blah. My summer of fun has turned into summer of sun and sweaty armpits. I have been letting my hair run wild for the last week. Untamed curls emerge from the wet, straight hair I walk out the door with each morning. This used to drive me mad, for years: wet hair, frizzy curls. Not only has the acceptance been breached, I actually kinda like it. After wanting tame hair for so long, submitting to wild hair is only natural. Weird.

I want to buy a Mac. I have a PC and although we're communing now as I type, I can't help but think of the sexy, sleek Macbook Air that just came out today. I'm not a tech nerd but my co-worker is and he just purchased it. (Caveat: tech-nerd isn't meant to be synonymous with Mac user) "Make that two," I said. I don't need it. But man do I want it! The image of giving my PC a flying lesson from my attic window has been hard to shake. Especially when it freezes every 10 minutes, oh yes, that is when the image turns HD.

The tempting Apple store offerings gave me a bad case of longing-and-instant-gratification. The iPhone 4 looked so cool and all the little "Learn more" icons beckoning with their neon blue claws began convincing me these wants were needs and my life is invariably dull without them.

What's worse, while I was reading my book on the bus back home I was convinced that I would be a NYtimes bestselling author, but...only if I had a Mac. (What the hell?) That's when I snapped out of it and bought some clothes at the mall. Oh wait! That isn't helping it. That's only stoking the fire. (Fast foward 45 minutes right before I flip the matchbook inside out - slowly ripping a match from it's tight knit familial row - slowly, slowly, zap!)

I'm sitting on the couch, just out of the shower, the sun is not so high, the humidity is abating, the haze is slowly lifting.

No wonder my mom sent me a clipping from the paper that read, "all you have is all you need". I like my mom, she knows stuff that she doesn't even know that she knows. Like the part when she needs to be the voice of reason for her daughter on the East coast.

Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose

2011-07-17T18:12:00.003-06:00

Just finished watching the final episode of Friday Night Lights. One of my favorite TV shows, ever. And it's not just because I love football, or Texas, or sweaty men....if you knew what was good for you, you'd start watching FNL now!

I have also never seen a more amazing (and enviable) married couple portrayed on television than Coach and Tami Taylor. Seriously.

Time on the T

2011-07-13T17:17:00.005-06:00

Since I've been spending more time on the T, I've had the chance to cruise through a few books a lot quicker than I would otherwise. I am almost excited to ride the T because it gives me a chance to disappear into another world. I figure that the time spent commuting to and from work each day will add up to about 2 books a week, at least.

I'm about 40 pages away from finishing Gilead.

Love it!

It's one of my sister's favorites. Actually, I asked two of my sisters to give me their top book choices to gear up for more summer reading.

Annie's top 3 are:
This Is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper
Sleepwalk With Me by Mike Birbiglia
The Help by Kathryn Stockett

Tara's top many are:
In the Heart of the Sea by Nathaniel Philbrick
Let the Great World Spin by Colum McCann
Naked by Nick Hornby
Beatrice and Virgil by Yann Martel
and
Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand ("That's exciting with a capital E")

My friend Meikel recommends:
Tender at the Bone
Garlic and Sapphires both by Ruth Reichl

I also have a few in my queue that I've been meaning to read but haven't yet. Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer is next!

Summer reading is so scrumptious.

It's always a treat when Tara comes

2011-07-05T20:28:00.003-06:00

Because I can look at this face non-stop.

If you're ever in Rhode Island, take a detour to the Fantastic Umbrella Factory. They have these ostrich type birds that growl like dinosaurs and maintain this facial expression that Tara has perfectly captured. The bugged-out eyes are a main feature.

We went hiking and exploring during the day and when night fell we would often go to a movie. The first movie we saw caught us trapped next to a tranny who called us a** holes despite our best attempts. He eventually ended up sprawled in the aisle instead of next to me in the fetal position. Anyway, it didn't deter us from returning the next night to watch Woody Allen's latest, Midnight in Paris. The picture of me at Middlesex Fells perfectly captures a classic 1920s' hair-do that comes naturally. I was born too late. I should've been a flapper girl from the 20s like Marion Coutillard from Midnight in Paris. I couldn't have tried harder.

Observing the view of Boston. We both hate our own profiles but we love each other's. I had a moment yesterday when I actually thought my profile rocked. Unheard of.

Yeah, so...

It's great when family comes and visits because it's a constant party. But then, it's one of the worst things when they leave. You end up crying on the drive home from the airport listening and singing along to their favorite songs.

The Sprint Tri!

2011-06-23T14:05:00.007-06:00

Well, here's the update from the Triathlon.

I know I said that I'd look like a turd out there, well it has just been confirmed as I have just spent a few minutes laughing out loud at the professional Tri pictures that I were recently emailed. I look like a ratty turd with my soggy hair catching air, suspended, permanently captured for all to see. Well, like I predicted, this turd was having the time of her life! (They gave me a towel at the end of the race and my head was hot.)

I can't believe I've wasted so many years of doing just boring races. A triathlon is definitely more exciting and the encouragement/motivation from fellow racers is just dynamite. You also got temporarily tattooed with your bib number and your age (back of left leg).

Here was the scoop:
Swim 1/4 mile
I was dead last 10 seconds in. I couldn't get it together with all the splashing, hitting, gagging sick rust colored water, etc. After a few seconds of motivating myself and pulling it together, I cruised past many swimmers. Let me just remind you all, I learned how to swim 2 weeks ago (and my swim coach from Walden was there at the race...I felt proud). I wasn't expecting the dizzy haze as I ran out of the water towards the transition area for the cycling portion.

Bike 14 miles
I. Was. On. A. Mission. I was passing people like crazy. The shoes I brought were already soaked from sloshing around wet grass all morning before the race started.

Run 4 miles
What the? I have legs? I have to touch the ground with my feet? I'm moving slower than a snail on weed! (Just a few thoughts as I headed out of the transition area for the last time). The countryside of E. Freetown, MA was absolutely gorgeous. I kept a pretty steady pace throughout. The sun finally sliced through the rain clouds and beat down pretty hard the last mile. A woman behind me moaned about her wounded IT band as she repeatedly cussed the more severe expletives. I was in my happy place for this race and just chatted it up with everyone. I was chatting with her before this point but glad she started ranting thus ending the conversation. My neck was hurting from throwing it back to talk to her.

So, I crossed the finish line while my friend dramatically tore her shirt off with crowds gleefully cheering and encouraging the mayem. I felt elated that I accomplished the tri because when the alarm went off at 4:15am that morning, I was ready to throw the towel in. So glad I didn't!

I'm definitely doing it next year, who's with me?

It's just nice to know sometimes

2011-06-19T19:11:00.005-06:00

I spent the evening on the brown couch we can't eat on reading a magazine, thinking and looking out the window. I get into these moods, often on a Sunday, when I just think about stuff. I like to just let time kind of glide along while I nuzzle drifting thoughts.

Another thing about these moods is that I like sharing with people who also like to think and speak in these so-called 'drifts'. I found an almost sacredness in this doing and being; however, if an observer was asked to give an account of the scene, it may not come out so serene and peaceful as I experienced it (or as I'm telling it now). ("Looks like a lazy sloth lounging in her underwear" for example). Somewhere along the way, I decided to call my dad to wish him a Happy Father's Day. I waited until I knew he'd be home and most likely listening to classical music while sitting on the blue couch that you can eat on.

Sure enough, the classical tunes were turned up loud and he was reclined on the couch.

We immediately launched into a lovely 'drifting' conversation. I didn't realize how much I loved talking to this man until it became clear to me that he, too, loves nuzzling deep thoughts and conversing about them. (Maybe that's who I get it from - which is a comforting thought). We didn't waste anytime talking about the superfluous or superficial. We talked a lot about teaching which was appropriate since he just finished the profession that I'm only barely heading into. He imparted wisdom, expressed his own failings and in all - just gave it to my straight.

Jon Green is pretty rad. Sheesh, I miss that guy and I don't usually miss him. But, right now, I really miss him.

What we tell ourselves

2011-06-14T18:15:00.002-06:00

There's a triathlon this Saturday. I'm in it. I don't really feel prepared - the story of my life. I rarely feel prepared for stuff and this is just another activity I'm launching into only semi-prepared (remember the swimming post? Yep.)

I'm sitting here thinking how I've been able to talk myself into things and the miracles that have resulted because of this 'positive talk'. That's why I'm blogging about it. I don't really have anything else going on to blog about so I'm throwing this out there if anyone else has felt this way, too.

My first example:
I don't like playing instruments/singing in front of people. The frequency with which I played the violin in front of people might have fooled my parents into believing that I was keen on performing. I'd ham it up because I think I like the attention; however, deep down it was all very scary and intimidating for me. I should've been more true to my feelings because I became a performing monkey for whenever my parents had guests. This continued into college and I'm only now free of it because I've moved across the country.

This wasn't supposed to be long winded so I'll get to the point. When I had violin recitals, I'd tell myself that I was going to have a blast and that performing in front of people was the funnest thing, ever! I'd get really into it by imagining myself as a professional violinist dancing and swaying and playing like I was born to. "This is going to be so fun! I love this! I love it so much" I'd say to myself almost in a frenzy the days leading up to the recital.

Well, it worked like a charm. My last recital was amazing. I had the best time and I distinctly remember swaying, smiling and cranking that bow while my little sausage fingers danced across the fingerboard.

It really works! Though I thought I tricked myself into having fun, I really did have fun. What we tell ourselves is pretty powerful. When it says in the Book of Mormon that we need to watch our thoughts, I think this is partly what is meant. Our thoughts are powerful and in turn influence our actions.

So, instead of lazily accepting the thoughts telling me, "you're going to look like a turd out there in the tri!" I'm replacing them with positive talk such as, "I'm going to have a lot of fun and who cares if I look like a turd, I'll be a happy turd having the time of her life!"

On today's date:

2011-06-09T13:22:00.010-06:00

My oldest sister Erin was born on this day. She used to comfort me at night when I woke up crying and my mom couldn't hear me. She'd hold me like a baby until I fell back asleep again. I love her muy mucho.

On June 9, 2004, I entered the Missionary Training Center not to return home for 18 months. I felt like I was held hostage in a high-security youth home only a few blocks from my house. It was only for 9 weeks though (the remaining 16 months would be spent in Austria and Germany). But in those 9 weeks, I experienced intensive German language and scripture study and was tested to my limits. How little did I know that I was going to be tested even further beyond any capacity I had previously breached. Yet, I made a lot of awesome friends and I was able to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ! That part was the most amazing thing. Also, that I got to do it in German, the language of my ancestors.

Speaking of German - my German grandmother is a rockstar.

She's my older, mini-me. The first part of this week was rough. I found out Monday morning at work that she had passed away during the early hours of the morning, thousands of miles away. It has been hard to be away from family and to grieve our loss and my own personal loss of a dear woman who meant a lot to me. Also, it marks the end of a generation. I still have her number in my phone but I know she won't be on the other end clearing her throat like she so often does. Today I wrote something about her.

She was afraid to die,
everyone knew it.
We knew because she never let us forget.
She used to make me omelets and drive me home from school.
I mowed her lawn in the summer and picked apricots in the fall.
She liked it when I came.
And she would blow me kisses whenever I left.
"You look just like her," people would say.
I'm sorry it didn't flatter me then.
She was old. I was still young.

She would stop strangers - all the time - and tell them jokes.
It embarrassed most of us but when you're old...
You get away with things like that.
She always did.
"Do you know why the strawberry was crying?" she'd say.
They never heard her the first time.
No one ever did.
Her voice was as small as she was.
But they always laughed in the end.
Always.

I tickled her feet once and wondered why I hadn't done it before.
We couldn't stop laughing.
She didn't like it, but we did.
So, I did it again.
And again.
Until she put a blanket on her feet and I got the hint.

Her eyes were blue, like the ocean.
They looked at me often and I knew she loved me tons.
I didn't think my last goodbye was going to be then.
The time I kissed her on the cheek and hugged her from her chair.
She was in her blue house-dress, always in the house-dress.
It matched her eyes, it was the one with white flowers printed on it.
Her feet, swollen and old, were propped up.
I could tickle them now, I thought. But she doesn't like it.
So, I didn't.
Instead,
I walked to the door, turned around and caught the kiss I knew she would send my way.
I put my hand with the kiss in it to my cheek and smiled.

She smiled back.
Surrounded by her piles of papers and things,
"Bye grandma, I love you," I said.
"I love you, honey."
And then I stepped out into the sun
gently closing the door behind me.

Vital swimming tips...

2011-06-05T19:51:00.004-06:00

Feast your eyes on this precious video. I was swimming at Walden the other day and had problems with my hair getting in my face. The sprint triathlon is in a couple of weeks and panic has already settled in. I asked some random guy to teach me how to swim. I really have no problems asking strangers for help. (Actually, it reminds me of when I dated my German man. I met him in the elevator at school and needed help registering so I thought, mmm, why not ask?) Perhaps I'm too lazy to do things on my own, but I like soliciting the help of others more experienced than I. So, this guy and his wife taught me a thing or two.

Yet, at the end of the day, I still had the hair-in-the-face problem (and a bad sunburn on my back). I'm considering a swimming cap. So, after the couple steered me to a few books I could buy and YouTube videos I could watch, I came upon this.

If you get a chance, read the posted comments. You'll wheeze like I did. My favorite is, "Why does he need a swim cap anyway? He has no hair..." I was thinking the same thing. Yeah, have the bald guy demonstrate how to put on a swim cap when his head doesn't even necessitate a cap. It obviously slid onto his gleaming scalp with incredible ease. He was kind enough to show where "the girls can tuck in their hair" though.

And for the record, I have no problem with bald men, in fact, they're sexy. It's just the irony that he has become my expert for getting hair out of my face.

p.s. Don't judgey judge.

Graduation day!

2011-06-04T15:19:00.007-06:00

TNY 2010-2011

Our fearless leader

The waking sleep

2011-05-26T13:50:00.000-06:00

Unlikely friendships

2011-05-21T15:51:00.005-06:00

After ten days of straight up rain, it 'sunned' today. And it has been terrific. It was my goal to go to the gym today but as I was sweating buckets in the tepid air I figured I needed to get outside. So, I did. I biked the Minuteman trail. The sun sent droves of families, youth groups and professional cyclists (I'm not really including myself here) out to the trail. It was perfect. I went all the way to the Boston/Maine train in Bedford where I picked up some fruit snacks and munched a little before making the 10mile ride back home.

Usually, I wear normal clothes when I cycle, it's easier to fit my keys, phone, money, etc in my pockets. Today was different since I was in my gym clothes, I had nowhere to put my stuff. I had to stuff my phone in my bra (this becomes quite embarrassing later on...but, where else was it going to go?) I did have a little pocket inside the lining of my shorts so I had my keys and money in there.

After I munched 1/2 of the snacks at the rest stop in Bedford, I safely tucked the remaining fruit snacks into the side of my shorts. Less than a minute from heading out, the package fell out and landed in the dirt. I braked so fast I almost fell off my bike but there was no way I was going to leave my jumped-ship fruit snacks. As I made my way back, a 60-something cyclist just behind me commented on seeing something drop. His name is Peter, an architect from Montreal, Canada. And from then on, we rode the 10 miles back side by side chatting like we were best friends.

Well, almost.

I wasn't ready to give up my music and fast pace so I continued at a faster pace till a traffic light stopped me and he caught up again after a minute. "You're fast," he said. I looked back at his bike and noticed he was wearing clips. "I'd be a lot faster if I had clips like you." Then, officially, we started chatting and sharing stories and taking turns being the first to pass runners, cyclists and walkers. It was cool. I like making friends like this with strangers. The embarrassing moment of the ride happened when we were talking about a recent article in The New Yorker and my phone started ringing inside my bra.

I still had music blaring in one ear and didn't hear my phone going off. Peter had to alert me of the fact that my phone was ringing. I was trying to sound like I knew things because I read The New Yorker but I felt slightly sabotoged that I was 'found out' that I'm really just a punk kid who doesn't feel ashamed about keeping a phone in her bra. I pulled it out as professionally as one can only attempt. Embarrassed and intrigued by the unknown number I sped ahead and answered only to find out it was the pharmacy asking me about a prescription.

At least I wasn't alone. At the busiest intersection in Arlington center, Peter dashed out into on-coming traffic. I shouted back in a stern motherly tone, "I don't think it's safe Peter!" and "Come back!" and a softer "Don't do that." Cars generously honked their horns and swerved to miss Peter as I watched him maneuver himself to the curb on the other side of the intersection. He graciously waited for me. When the light turned in my favor and I cycled over to him I scolded him for foolishly flying out into the road. Apparently 45+ minutes with someone gives you the balls to call them out. Anyway, he kindly mentioned that he has learned by experience that if you just go for it, people will usually see you if you go slow enough. (I hope he didn't teach this to his children growing up, I didn't necessarily find it to be sage advice.)

He rides every Saturday and wants to do it three times a week since the weather is good. When we parted ways, I couldn't shake the feeling that it felt like we were two kids saying goodbye after a day at the baseball field. Kind of an a-la-Sandlot-style when all the kids part ways and throw out phrases like, "see ya around". Because, that's exactly what we said to each other. Don't know when or if we will, but it was fun.

The good day was preceded by an awesome night at Lykke Li's live show at the House of Blues and the day got even better with a chilly swim at Walden pond. Ah life. I love you heaps.

So this is it?

2011-05-15T17:15:00.002-06:00

The portfolio is done. UMass classes are done. It's over. I'm still teaching but except for that. Done. It's all a little anticlimactic right now.

Graduation is on June 3rd so I'm expecting it to feel real then.

Confidence boost

2011-05-07T17:20:00.004-06:00

With my face constantly breaking out, I feel not-at-all pretty. My friend Angelo was convinced that I look like Rosie the Riveter. Whether it's true or not, many thanks for making me feel cool.

I'll keep it

2011-05-04T17:29:00.005-06:00

Green grass
Blossom-y trees and a little bit of a breeze.
Grilled cheese sandwiches.
Ice cream and lots of it. Especially after class. Yes.

Compliments from people(?):
Yes to: "Have you been losing weight?"
But no to: "You know you still look like Jasper from Twilight?"

Cycling: Last week I was able to squeeze in 42 miles in 2 days. I loved it.
Family: I get to see them in a couple of days in the Big Apple (HEEEEEE!)
Friends and laughter
TV.
Finishing up a year from hell and subsequent FREEDOM.

And a New England spring - summer.

Driving with the windows rolled down

2011-04-30T21:15:00.003-06:00

This is my favorite part about warmer days and cool nights.

Yesterday I biked 20 miles with a grin on my face the whole time (ok, almost the whole time - minus the time when I swallowed three gnats and braked to dodge a swerving car).

I biked again today - same distance and same smile. I was proud of myself and I was proud of the weather for being such a rockstar. All of us outdoorsy enthusiasts certainly appreciated it. It felt nice to enjoy the wind again, like an old friend.

Driving home with the windows rolled down and music on quite loud felt good. Again, like an old friend who finally returned. I screamed into the dark wind and wailed a few shouts at the stars just cause. I lost an earring and my voice in the process. No biggie. Oh, the wisdom tooth pain was sorted. The oral surgeon found and had to remove some unwanted bone fragments.

Yeah, I'm just really happy Spring is here!

The wisdom of a fool won't set you free

2011-04-27T09:39:00.005-06:00

Cue back to when I was sitting sedate on the reclining dentist's chair staring into the expressionless face of the oral surgeon. "This is serious", he said. I nodded.

He nodded back.
I nodded again.
He said some other 'stuff' and I figured I got it so,...nodding again.

Two weeks later I wake up at 3am with a huge knot in my neck. I thought I was sleeping on a rock but it was actually my neck! Oh, it's probably a knotted muscle so, I started massaging it gently to relieve the pain and get back to, well, nodding off again.

Driving to school. Talking with students. Teaching. All the while the little bump on my neck growing bigger and nastier than before. The more massaging I did, the more it hurt. At that point, I rushed downstairs to the high school nurse who graciously saw me even though, "I don't see adults". [Daggers in her eyes].

"Your glands are very swollen. Go see a doctor." And then she huffily walked off.
[Daggers in my eyes].

After many calls to this doctor and that doctor (and this sister and that sister), I recall the moment after the widsom tooth extraction when I was explicitly instructed to take antibiotics, all of them (apparently).

I called myself a fool in my head multiple times while chugging water and 4 ibuprofen to get me through my 2 1/2 hour night class. Normally, I shouldn't take ibuprofen (not good for peeps with IBS/IBD) but considering the option of 1.) increasing my chipmunk face/pain and 2.) stomach bloating/pain - I chose the latter. Was that the lesser of two evils? I don't know. What I really wanted to do was crack a bat over my head and pass out into LaLa Land where I could skip and prance about with woodland creatures while we sang a happy medley about sunshine and smiles.

Well, that almost happened. Instead, I opted for groggily enduring class and drooling out of the side of my mouth while mumbling Britney Spears' Till the World Ends.

Fine print and little seeds

2011-04-22T16:33:00.004-06:00

For the most part, I love a good surprise. In fact, I love a lot of surprises - the more the better. But then, there are those surprises that make you wish that you had read the fine print and noticed what was 'hidden' from view.

I have been making some discoveries. I've realized that I like to be surprised by things that I don't necessarily need to be surprised about. I signed my name on a lot of papers at the beginning of the year that I am only know realizing the extent of the contractual agreement as per the fine print. In layman's terms: I owe UMass 600 bones I don't even have. Didn't see that one coming? I was listening to This American Life (podcasts: a new/beloved obsession) and stole the title of their latest episode "Fine Print". Do you know that some rock bands have contracts that make it so that they have to have M&Ms in their dressing room minus the brown M&Ms? People are weird. And many a poor venue must deliver the goods when striking deals with bands and their foolhardy fine print.

We planted some seeds about a month ago. They were so small they kept falling through my fingers. Though my Kindergarten experiences have already assured me that small seeds can become something, I'm surprised each time I go downstairs and see the little guys growing. It's miraculous. Really, how did those little dots shoved into a mound of dirt become a bunch of leafy green cilantro sprouts? I like this surprise.

I like small things and I like it when they grow. Like little kids with little striped shirts with their chubby bellies poking out. That was a signature Green style: striped shirts and bellies. I may be mourning my childhood right now and that's probably why I'm blogging about fine print and little seeds. As kids, we plant little seeds and watch them grow. We play in the mud and get grass stains. As adults, we can do all these things, too. And even have a paint dance party, like we did today to celebrate Earth Day. It felt good standing in the shower and watching the water rushing over my head turn pink, green and blue.

But, the difference is the fine print. I don't like that I sign my name to stuff and have to keep track of all my usernames and passwords that are virtually a variation on one theme just for simplicity's sake. Or that I have bills to pay and health insurance and all the pills to worry about. I miss you little seeds and days of carefree living. I do like that I can eat ice cream at any time of day and before dinner, too if I want. That's when fine print trumps little seeds.

This or that

2011-04-18T18:34:00.002-06:00

There's this hole in the back of my throat that is stitched up in two places. The stitches are poking the back of an already smaller-than-normal sized mouth. I carry a syringe around with me so that I can make sure that food particles don't get stuck. At brunch today I got a hot cup of water and no one thought much about it because we were eagerly trying each other's omelets, sweet potato waffles and chocolate chip pancakes.

I love food, especially good food and the good eats at Ball Square Cafe is the epitome of good food. They even fried my blueberry muffin and baked my mashed potatoes! I remembered the hot water's purpose at our table and started salting it up, shaking vigorously. One friend stopped mid-sentence and bobbled her head towards the 'please-explain-this' non-verbal cue. When I whipped out my syringe and filled it up, I felt like a nurse. Professional like. I waited till we were outside before squirting it into my mouth. But since I was already feeling like a professional nurse, I turned the syringe upside down and eased the air bubbles out. It really wouldn't have mattered but whatever, I was going to have fun with it anyway. I ended up emitting a saline arc 10 feet away right into my friend's face who was unlocking her bike. Then when I was doing the actual squirting, it came in too fast and I had to spit it all out near my feet and a policeman's. That was all fun and games but taking that cuss-word syringe out after I eat anything has forced me to admit, out loud: "I would rather have a colonoscopy than get a wisdom tooth pulled. It's true.

I feel kind of bad that I'm complaining about this kind of pain that seems so manageable. I felt sheepish when I was cheering at the Boston Marathon at the end of Heartbreak Hill. There were people flying by with huge grins on their faces. There were some people propelling themselves forward, arms pumping while their pathetic legs dragged behind them. Then there were those who looked like they could single handedly kill every spectator with their bare hands (especially this one kid screeching out a single note on a trumpet).

The look in their eyes reminded me of my own marathon experience, the one and only. I saw a man cross the finish line close after I crossed drenched in sweat and bleeding from his nipples. (The image is forever chiseled into my memory) Ouch! Painful. He was caught by two volunteers when he crossed the finish line, in all his glory? I watched in fascination and horror not knowing how to respond. I couldn't walk normally for days and I had to take the stairs sideways. But at least my nipples weren't torn to shreds like other people's.

So back to the Boston Marathon, I got into a long conversation with two strangers who saw me with my bike and just felt like a good chat. The woman was a nurse and feeling a slight kinship (syringe safely tucked away in my bag) we yacked about nurse stuff. I didn't really have any stories so I shamelessly talked about my sister's cancer and being present when her femur bone snapped in half. Now, that's pain! All of a sudden, the pain in the empty socket that was my wisdom tooth's beloved home for so long didn't seem so unbearable. It's all about perspective. And, it's about how you deal with interruptions in your daily flow. They happen all the time, and I can only hope that I can handle interruptions, pain, whatever, with more grace.

Goodbye, Wisdom Tooth #1

2011-04-15T08:18:00.005-06:00

I've been lazily taking in the warmth of my newly acquired queen size bed. My feet are now where my head was and vice versa. I'm attaching myself, leechlike, to the sounds of the bird outside my window. I'm imagining myself strapped to their little wings taking in the cool spring breeze. My left jaw is swollen where it hadn't been yesterday and a dull throbbing still persists. I honestly thought I would be as good as new after getting only one wisdom tooth extracted. I've had four teeth pulled at once before so I kind of felt like an old hand at it. The dentist carefully placed all four teeth in a pouch and sent me packing with a handful of gauze and a sucker for later. So, it was long enough ago for the tooth fairy to still be on my mind. Still. All the stories I heard before the procedure were punctuated with, "well, you'll get laughing gas/it was quick/you'll sleep a lot after/did I mention the laughing gas? Loved it". Not only was I deprived of the laughing gas goodness, it wasn't an option. I got the regular needle-in-the-mouth. And my hand kept going up during the extraction as I tried to articulate "I can still feel it" with four hands and hardware sticking out of my mouth. Yep. And even now the pain is bothersome. And I need to be careful. I don't like being careful, especially when I eat. I'd rather shove some tortilla chips in, chew a few times, swallow and repeat. No chips for me for a while so I'm plying my motherly skills by gently spoon-feeding myself pudding and yogurt. It's kind of fun. I feel like a baby which makes me grunt and moan a little more than usual. I've also fantasized about purchasing baby food: the banana one in the little bottles, that one always looked especially good. It's a really bad time to be craving steak though. And I'm craving it bad.

The New Yorker: my obsession

2011-04-06T09:05:00.002-06:00

I made the mistake of taking The New Yorker with me on the T yesterday morning. I started reading A Murder Foretold, a compelling account of political conspiracies, and read it at every free moment until the 15 pages were appropriately consumed and digested.

I retold the story last night to friends while we were stranded in a seedy area of Dorchester with a broken car and its faulty alternator. (Cue to random people surrounding the car-slash-making out-slash-smoking-slash-making me nervous). I really wanted to cuss and stuff with the broken down car, the cold and the loss of productivity but in reality, I couldn't be productive until I finished the magazine cover to cover anyway. I couldn't tear myself away. I neglected all my homework and portfolio writing just to finish the beepity boop article/magazine.

This morning, I woke up in a sweat from a nightmare where I played a part in the story, A Murder Foretold! Also, my former co-workers at the chiropractic office were in it, too. We pretty much rued the day but it was still frightening. That cursed article is. Just. So. Irresistible.

I must own this T-shirt!

2011-04-04T09:49:00.004-06:00

And it's less than 20 bucks. Anyone want to give me a graduation gift come June?! Or go the extra mile and get my face photoshopped in somehow?

From Wounded Rhymes

2011-03-31T16:15:00.002-06:00

This song is haunting. I woke up this morning singing the melody. It's lovely. I Lykke Li that I've got tickets to the concert in May!

One of those days

2011-03-30T09:27:00.003-06:00

Between Two Lungs by Florence + the Machine is on repeat.

It's one of those days. Everything about this song makes me happy from the memories it evokes to Florence's lung power. I was watching an interview of her at Sundance and the interviewer commented on how loud she is. She laughed and said, "I grew up in a big family, I had to learn to shout so that people would hear me".

I grew up in a big family, too. I needed to shout so that I could be heard, too. I did it with laughter more than anything. My laugh mixed wheeze serves as proof: my lungs burst early on and now I'm left with a tiny mouth and no lung power. (I've always had the tiny mouth - and to be fair, I can scream heaps louder than most girls in spite of it). Still, it's not the best recipe for a high school teacher. In fact, I was noticing more acutely today how my voice doesn't carry. At least it wasn't carrying today because my voice was drowned out by dozens of other voices. Florence has something to teach me.

She ended the interview by saying that now she doesn't have to shout because when she opens her mouth, people listen.

Love it. Even more so because she still shouts. Might as well. People are listening, make it worth it.

To enjoying a fancy feast

2011-03-28T18:50:00.009-06:00

Bless good food after no food. If I look sickly in the picture below, it's because I was. But nothing a little curry/rice/miso soup couldn't fix. You know how I wasn't supposed to drive, well Doctor, I did anyway even when you said not to. It's ok. The food was worth it, the waiter was hilarious and there was rice. That's that. Oh, and the chopsticks smelled a little weird. I tried my hand at making my own curry tonight. My brother coached me through (I had to go the flour slash corn starch route). It took me till 9pm to feast on the goods, but it was worth it.

On being queen for the day

2011-03-25T15:08:00.003-06:00

The doctor said I should go home, rest, don't sign any legal documents or operate a vehicle, and be a queen for the day.

My being a queen for the day means sleeping on the couch in a pile of blankets. It was colonoscopy day today and yesterday's cleanse was the easiest one yet. It was a little too easy in fact. At first, I even forgot I was fasting for a few brief moments of Skittle munching in the teacher's room. You're not supposed to eat for the entire day prior and I had completely forgot. The moment of realization hit me hard and I called the clinic immediately, "I just ate some skittles!" The nurse on the other line, "it's OK, just don't do it again".

Being queen today also means ending the 36 hour fast with some rice/quinoa/stir-fry and a jug of gatorade. That was nice. Downside is my bowels weren't ready and I'm back to the couch instead of enjoying the sun with a camera on my back. I wouldn't be able to go far anyway, I'm still not walking in a straight line. So, being queen isn't all that it has cracked up to be.

Besides, it's really my brother's day to be royalty. It's his birthday and I'm sure his kingly ship is enjoying some cake and ice cream right about now. I happily relinquish my queen day to celebrate his king day.

Intimidated by technology

2011-03-21T17:19:00.006-06:00

I gots a new camera, and it took me a few days before the intimidation wore off. Here's a sampling from one day of capturing. I'm reading the manual front to back for good measure.

Meikel, if you're reading this: how do you get your pictures to look so amazing. teach me!

On the radio, in my head

2011-03-17T06:49:00.002-06:00

I like.

I want to hang out with this fine, welcomed foray of eye candy.

Where the sun shined in winter

2011-03-14T16:36:00.005-06:00

Winter break in the Virgin Islands : full of sunshine and sticky sand

I'm late in reporting on the February reprieve from New England weather and school and work. And real life. I have said (written in my journal) before that leaving home is like escaping the worries that settle down to a transparent dust that forgets you just like you forget them.
I forgot them when I jumped in the clear waters of the Caribbean. I forgot them again when we were snorkeling with sea turtles and sting rays. I forgot them sipping the best Pina Colada of my life (in caps to emphasize its greatness). And again eating Klondike bars in shorts and a T-shirt with sand between my toes. And yet again hiking down to petroglyphs and a coral reef.

As much as I enjoy New England, it was freaking dead winter weight that needed to be sloughed off. And it still is, my skin is still sloughing off my island winter tan. I enjoyed it while it lasted.

Dog days

2011-03-08T16:37:00.002-07:00

Photos courtesy of Rachel Broadbent, my cuz

This is Rocco, my cousin's dog. I stole these pictures from Facebook (if you didn't know I submitted to this corruption again, I have) because I couldn't get enough.

Today Mr. President was in Boston. I heard on the radio that Lady GaGa is in Boston, too. They actually mentioned these two in the same breath. Whether that was an intentional juxtaposition, we shall never know. I'm surprised they didn't mention Charlie Sheen and his most recent shenanigans. Really, are we so starved for sensational celebritism? (I'm coining a new term apparently)

In other news...it was sunny today and I was almost hoping for some sultry dog days of a stagnant late summer so I could nap guilt free. But wait! Then I thought, how could I pass over Spring and early Summer so lightly? Indeed, I can't. So, it is with much joy that I enjoy the day to day and not wish for the future too much. I have to enjoy the present. The present that gives me impromptu rectal exams and a colonoscopy appointment that I hadn't etched in to my schedule. Yeah, the procedural doctor's visit turned uncomfortable pretty quickly. TMI? Probably, so, I'll spare us all.

P.S. I really would like to own a dog, a small one that nobody really likes because they're akin to rats. But I love them. Every dog we owned as a kid was small so I have this nostalgic affinity for them. I also heard that if you talk in Motherese (high pitched/baby talk) to a wiener dog, it'll involuntarily pee. K. I'm done with the potty humor. Promise.

Spring

2011-03-06T16:05:00.002-07:00

It kinda sprung today. As in, the snow piles are finally being flattened (thank you rainy rain) and the air smelled sweet. And the breeze was kinda warm. Seriously, it put me in an awesome mood.

And as a recap: took the test, took all day Sat, but I'm done. I may have lost a piece of my soul in the process but here's hoping the results are favorable!

Meanwhile, I was watching some youtube videos of Justin Bieber this morning - don't judge me - and his fans are sometimes called Beliebers. Haha, oh, that was funny.

Pending

2011-03-01T12:58:00.003-07:00

I can't shake this uncomfortable looming monster from my shoulders. The monster is just looming, with no face, no name. Not that I feel shackled by anyone or thing that would make me feel this way, only, my life has taken so many decidedly unexpected detours that my excitement for the future has inevitably turned into uncertain sideways glances. "What are you going to try and pull next, dear one?" The trepidation in part has stemmed from all the deadlines Time has narrowed me in on without my consent. Life really is a volley of punches we're either dodging or leaning into with a prayer on our lips. This can be quite fun though, as a racquetball player enthusiast, I can't help but encourage the thrill of the unexpected. But, today I'm just not feeling it. Yesterday, too. Once again I am spinning out. I think this week is particularly haunting because of this huge test I'm heading towards that would certify me as a real teacher that I feel utterly and completely unprepared for. I hate tests. Loathe them. The ones where you fill in little bubble sheets with pencil precision. I can't help fretting over the aesthetics of how my bubble sheet looks. "I can't possibly have three Cs in a row!" I know, pathetic how this upsets me and my OCD tendencies. But really, isn't the best possible answer subjective anyway?!?!

Oh well. I'll let you know how I survived after Saturday.

American Airlines 0, Delta 1

2011-02-26T14:34:00.002-07:00

It has only been a day back from the U.S. Virgin Islands and already my tanned skin is peeling away, frightened by New England's freezing temperatures.

It was ethereal to sunbathe on a daily basis, snorkel with sea turtles and sting rays with the only worry being whether I sufficiently covered my body in sunscreen and bug spray. I failed every time on both accounts, my itchy legs and leprous skin attest to my lazy island negligence. I caught up on months of missed sleep and sun in no time though while sipping my pina coladas and listening to this.

American Airlines and mother nature squished my holidaze pretty quickly on the trip back home. The plane out of St. Thomas had to be 'jump-started'. The flight to DC from Miami was cancelled for the rest of the day due to high speed winds. 5 failed standby flights to Boston and no food/shelter vouchers later, I finally deflated and walked zombie like through the now well-acquainted Miami-Dade Airport. I was pretty good for the first 9 hours of frolicking about, testing perfume, running races and moving from standby gate to standby gate.

American Airlines flew us to Philly and then left us to our own devices. Delta was to take us from NYC to Boston so we just needed to get to NYC within a time frame of 4 hours. While keeping myself awake on the flight to Philly with heaps of the nectar called Diet Coke and Dr. Pepper, I was able to drive our rental car from Philly to NYC in two hours. I still don't know how we got there. I do know that we stopped at Pat's for the famous Philly cheesesteaks at 2am. I love establishments that are open 24 hours a day. A whiz wit (with the onions and processed cheese whiz - drool!) kept me pumping on our way up the Jersey tpk. I wasn't even tired!

But, oh how the sandman's bag of sandy tricks cut me deep coming into Brooklyn. It was 4am and I had almost been up for a full 24 hours. I had one more can of American Airlines complimentary cokes left which I quickly downed to stave off sleep. It didn't make a dent in the sand piling around my eyelids. I missed our turn off, I said weird things to the car rental guy at La Guardia and I slept on the conveyor belt in the Delta terminal farting like crazy before our flight.

We encountered more problems that even I don't remember. All I remember is feeling frightened for my life after I snarkily asked some people to move out of the way to let other passengers by. One of the guys yelled "shut your face" and walked a short distance away. Sleepy talk Tin Tin said, "excuse me?" like a little girl in pig tails would when told her pig tails aren't in style anymore. I think my hand was on my hip, too. Not only did the blood boil in my face, I was afraid he was going to eat me for breakfast. His friend intervened by telling us both to "just let it go". Rattled and genuinely frightened it was our luck that we shared planes back to bonny Boston.

Finally! After dozens, if not hundreds, of New Englanders snaked their way up the Eastern Seaboard for home no thanks to American Airlines. (But thank you for the free Coke - there really is no limit to in-flight beverages I came to find out. Just keep going to the back of the plane sweetly asking if they by chance have a Diet Coke lying about. They always do!) Bless.

Motivational posters at school

2011-02-12T17:41:00.004-07:00

"Change. Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you want to become."

"Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it."

I'm not one for motivational posters but for some reason this week I noticed, and appreciated, a couple of them. They meant something to me because this week I was tried, wrung dry, challenged and otherwise led through the refiner's fire. I surprised some young faces when I showed up Wednesday after Tuesday's disaster. And in spite of myself, I have felt like I've been in a state of grace. Maybe I'm doing some surrendering, some healthy reacting.

can I get an amen?

Old goodly friends

2011-02-10T13:33:00.005-07:00

I should really say friends since birth, not old, but we're definitely a lot older than when we first played in the sprinklers together/ate loads of stolen sweets together/got stuck in elevators together/giggled about boys together/etc.

My goodly hoodly was full of goodly friends. Meikel (lovely lady on the far left) took piccies from this past summer and just recently blogged about growing up with these ladies.

Take a look at her blog here for more pics. I remember when we talked about who we thought would be the first to serve a mormon mission, the first to graduate from college, the first to get married, the first to have a baby,...

I definitely didn't think I'd be the first and only missionary and the last and lonely single one, but hey, life is still sweet: I get to teach inner city pubescent teens how to write 5 paragraph essays.

And, I don't have stretch marks. (Though I would almost welcome them if I could have cutie patootie kidlets like they do)

Thank you for the music

2011-02-07T17:57:00.004-07:00

I love this video.

Check out 3:10 and beyond. The fireworks on command are hilarious, especially when watching the little kid on the left. He's not as focused on the choreography as much as he is about hailing forth bursts of lightning. And he's most definitely loving every minute of it, as am I, clearly. I can't stop talking about it and I'm dedicating my scanty blogging to it since I have nothing else going on in my life to write about. (Scratch that: my life is work, school, gym, sleep. Work, school, gym, sleep...and you get the picture.)

My roommate and I sang a rendition to ABBA's Thank You For the Music to my iPod when it died over the weekend. I haven't belted out a more heartfelt song in a long time (and this includes the hymns I'm singing at church, sadly I must confess, it's true.) Ask my other roommate who was sleeping on the couch downstairs during the dedication. Her nap was cut short by our out-of-tune barking. I know this because she texted us during the song.

Sweet music on the iPod has saved my life during the mindless treadmill running at the gym.

Thank you iPod for coming back to me and thank you to The Temper Trap for being so rad. (I saw them live and they sang with a lot of soul - they could benefit from having me in their band. They would have been happy to have been woken up from their nap. I'm sure of it.)

Happily

2011-02-01T18:52:00.004-07:00

Did you say we have another snow day?

Yes.

Yes?

Yes.

The wknd

2011-01-31T13:58:00.007-07:00

Friend Amber came from the Big Apple to visit our goodly hoodly Boston!

We went to Mike's Pastry for some cannolis. A must.

We went to Kick a** Cupcakes near Davis square: $3 treats that look like poop.

We wrestled in the snow.

We admired my pirate eye.

We visited Bunker Hill, too.

SADly

2011-01-26T12:22:00.006-07:00

Supposedly human skin makes Vitamin D3 when exposed to the sun's ultraviolet rays. When there is no sun, like in Boston, then it is no wonder that cases of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) run rampant.

I'm self-diagnosing: I'm one of those people suffering from the sun's scarce presence. It's snowing now and I look out at it with the F word blazing (kind of like the sun - with similar intensity) in my eyes. Though I offer this caveat that if the snow yields a snow day #4 then that F word means Freakyesfreakyesfreakyes - I have never been so interested in the weather till I became a teacher.)

Anyway.

I have religiously popped in my daily Vitamin D3 pill. After a quick consultation via text with a friend about my SAD diagnosis she offered the following solutions:

Friend: Maybe you should exercise more?
Me: I have a gym pass!
Friend: Do you use it?
Me: ALL the time (if it weren't via text you'd know the answer to this)

Friend: Do you still take D3? Maybe you should take more...?
Me: More than just the one?
Friend: Why not?

When I woke up in the morning I popped in 6 pills and expectantly awaited that rush of happiness to bathe me in solar-like goodness. Driving through the morning ice and snow made it a little difficult, but after I had closed my eyes and let the heater works its magic, I was feeling pretty tropical. (NB: I wasn't driving) Just hook that vitamin juice to my veins. Do it quickly. Do it now.

If someone feels so obliged to tell me about overdosing on D3, do so now because I'm not going to Google it. Ignorance is bliss.

"Dreams really do come true"

2011-01-21T10:19:00.003-07:00

My finger tips are already beginning to numb, I can tell because of the tip tap typing of the keys on my keyboard.

That's right, snow days really DO come true. I'm sitting at home enjoying Snow Day #3 by eating eggs and toast for breakfast and learning how to play Somewhere Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World by Isreal Kamakawiwo'ole on my uke. My numbed little finger tips are on their way to calloused status.

I tried to learn this song five years ago when I was in Hawaii but I felt like a poser Haole trying to be the cool Islander. Also, I couldn't get the strumming right so I inevitably felt clumsy and awkward. And it was painful, but probably more so from the 5" mosquitoes repeatedly stabbing at my ankles and legs, and much to my dismay, scarring them for years to follow. Note to self: USE the insect repellant stuffed in your bag. Hawaii is full of steriod-induced creatures. You feel like you're all the same size. The roaches being the exception, they are bigger.

But Bruda Iz, is the biggest of all. Hopefully I can finally conquer the song. Enjoy the above link and this one for another one of my Hawaii beach cruise favorites.

Snow more

2011-01-19T18:40:00.005-07:00

Fluffy, lovely flakes of celestial dust.
Layers of grime and the penetrating cold.
I love you. I hate you.

Prayers for snow day number 3 are currently underway.

And this song deserves another nod from a couple of years ago.

What are you looking at?

2011-01-10T18:47:00.005-07:00

You know you've made an impression on high school students when one says: "Miss, you look like that Jasper kid from the Twilight series."

Cue to my inner dialogue: What? You're kidding me? What the...this kid thinks I look like the boy vampire who constantly looks like he's in a state of constipation! I'm depressed. Oh wait? Isn't he also the vampire with the crazy big eyes?

Me: "It's because of the eyes, right?"
Student: "Yeah." (Duh...)

Me: "Oh, ok, that's fine (I guess). Get back to work."

Me: (Oh, and don't forget to watch me in the upcoming Twilight series installment. I'm the one in the pink wig named Jaspera - and apparently I'm advocating for automobile safety.)

To 2010, With Love

2011-01-01T08:56:00.008-07:00

2010:
An unexpected roadtrip to CA with strangers, who became friends (and a future roommate).
One-way ticket to London, England and an official graduate of King's College London. (Why did I ever leave London?!)

One-way ticket to New York City: lived in Brooklyn and moved to Manhattan's Upper West Side after snagging my 'dream job' near Time's Square as Assistant Director of a non-profit only to discover it wasn't so dreamy afterall. You were hard NYC, but I learned to absolutely adore you. You gave me awesome roommates and an apt. full of roaches. You also gave me the best soundtrack (Jens Lekman, Lykke Li, Beach House, Coeur de Pirate, etc.) and miles and miles of streets to walk down.

One-way ticket to Utah with no money in my pockets: a not so dream job turned DREAM job with the best people, ever. Tuning fork moments left and right (you know who you are).
Accepted to UMass Boston for M.Ed and Teach Next Year (TNY) and so, only months later... (cue to frustrated moments of why-did-you-think-you-needed-a-second-masters?!)

Driving across country in 3 days with K1 Boston bound.
New England, new friends and new discoveries (Love you Maine, NH, R.I., CT, NY - as always - and see you soon VT!)

Teaching kicking my butt day in and day out. But in spite of it all, I love my students.

3 visits to Utah for two weddings and a Christmas surprise - best surprise ever.

Notable discoveries:

rice + quinoa = my fave dish

stamina + endurance = the only way to survive TNY

friends + weekend adventures = the (essential) cherry on top

WALDEN!!!

Boston + single Mormon boys = depressing

red-eye flights + no sleep = inevitable bowel disaster(s)

prayer + work + faith = miracles!

Neither seen nor heard (nor smelled)

2010-12-30T16:27:00.006-07:00

I got sick yesterday and am still in the process of recovering. The post-Christmas feelings of guilt from having eaten too much on sweets has not been lost on me. Though in my case, I think it was the combination of bad sleeping habits, heaps of sweets and too much dairy which has sent my poor body into a weakened state.

After watching a movie on the love sac, I spent the next hour napping on it but not without getting jumped on twice by my nephews' friends. They were as shocked as I was: though I pitied them more (I was sans bra, in my sister's sweats and greased out in facial sweat). I have never known a house to be so hopping with activity. I wanted to hide in a corner and wait out the rest of this holiday bug in solitude. And the doorbell kept on ringing! The kids kept. on. coming.

There was nowhere to go and hide my sick, un-showered self. At one point I decided to get my clean clothes from the wash upstairs. My mind got side-tracked, as you do when you're sick, by a book about marathon runners. I sat down on the couch with my underwear piled around me like a nest of fluffy snow and had a good read. I read a bit but instantly got those urges when your body is about to explode. When I emerged from the toilet I let out a huge "ewww" sound to warn my sister of the smell of death. Instead of finding my sister there in the room, 1/2 a dozen teens were staring at me wondering who the hell I was. I gave a curt Forrest Gump salute, said "I'm Tara's sister" and then ran away. Actually, it would be more accurate of me to say I slinked away like my 93-year old grandma in her walker.

It's true, I spent a lot of time on the bathroom floor poised in The Position to puke my guts out into the toilet. At least it was the only place where I didn't have to face the wide-eyed stares from the gawking neighbor kids. (These same kids moved my underwear from the living room couch where I had my nest and 'neatly' threw them in a chaotic cluster on the floor of the laundry room so they could play games and otherwise decrease my areas of safe space.) I sought refuge in the master bedroom where I watched a bizarre English film called Happy Go-Lucky and canoodled my sister. That was nice.

My sister, God bless her, went to the store to stock up on pills and ginger ale: the two things I dared consume that day. I went to bed feeling just as icky as when I greeted the day. In my prayers, I asked God for the next day to be different. And by that I meant, a helluva lot better.

And it has been so far. I took a shower. (and went to lunch and got a manicure and...)

A Christmas Miracle

2010-12-26T22:25:00.004-07:00

I surprised my family Christmas day by sneaking into the house and just saying hey as if I'd been there all along. They thought I was staying in Boston for the holidays. Little did they know...My mom screamed with both hands on her cheeks. My grandma's eyes bugged out. My sister almost lost her voice from freaking out. And I couldn't stop laughing and hugging the crap out of them all. My sister Tara knew about my coming and picked me up from the airport in Vegas at the unholy hour of 1am on Christmas Eve. She saved me when I was on the verge of a mental breakdown by showering me with love, amazing brie cheese and a poster of David Bowie. We also listened to this song non-stop which reminds me of her and of Christmas.

I couldn't have asked for a better holiday season. We ate great food. Grandma fell asleep at the dinner table. My dad barked at me in futile attempts to stop my pestering him. Diana's pies and pajamas. Gingerbread house building contests. Edward Scissorhands. Christmas carols. Friends and piggyback rides. Falling down in the snow. Taking naps. Cuddling.

And the laughter, can't forget the laughter. Or Jesus, goes without saying!

To my sister

2010-12-22T14:44:00.005-07:00

It's Natalie's birthday today. I love her. She loves me. We love each other.

Children Dancing

2010-12-19T08:06:00.003-07:00

and beautiful people. Two reasons why:

I love this song. And I love this video.

Caveat:

2010-12-17T09:14:00.002-07:00

As a native Provoan and BYU alumna, Provo UT girls are not all like this. But don't take my word for it, you be the judge.

'Tis the season

2010-12-07T18:16:00.002-07:00

Christmas.

I. Am. So. Freaking. Excited.

School Day

2010-12-04T21:45:00.006-07:00

Saturday school day realizations: the campus center cafeteria is closed, the heat isn't turned on and it's still $6 for parking.

Unfortunately, we had to pay for parking twice on account of fleeing the premise in search for food at our lunch break.

I have been dreading this training for weeks now, weeks. No one wants their weekends hijacked least of all me, the free-time whore. For example, I'm blogging while my studious friend here is poring over her lesson and unit plans. The minute we got home, I donned sweat pants and made a B-line for the fridge.

The 'school' day passed surprisingly quickly. Our teacher was a riot. I was laughing annoyingly loud at which point I had to put my head down and think sad thoughts so as to avoid making a scene. There were a few of those moments. And it wasn't like she was rifling through her latest stand-up comedy routine. I mean, we were discussing such topics as disabilities, communication disorders, autism, etc. She did admit that she was getting a little silly after the 7th hour though. It was also at this time that I was losing it. When the 8th hour was upon us and we were all packing to go, I had this weird thought called 'fun' that came to mind. I had some fun. What the?

It shocked me.

And it's going to shock me again tomorrow when I wake up and realize that a day that felt like Friday didn't yield a Saturday but rather a Sunday. That's when 'fun' might turn into 'disbelief' and 'wtf! where's my weekend?'.

Kids

2010-11-29T18:50:00.002-07:00

My sister said that it was only a few years ago when she realized that she wasn't a kid anymore. She's turning 30 next month.

These past few months, I've wanted nothing more than to go back to being a kid. When grass stains and peanut butter & jelly sandwiches were the essence of being. As kids, we would play trolls in the back yard while splashing in the canal. We would run up the mountain barefoot with snacks in our bags and our hair getting unbelievably tangled. Our feet would get muddy, too. We'd stay out until the stars called us in.

A lot has changed since then, but I can't help but think that we're still much the same.

Not only us, but our friends, too.

Chocolate

2010-11-29T18:39:00.004-07:00

Any time I'm in NYC, I find myself sitting down for an intoxicatingly delightful sweet at The Chocolate Room. The prices, like any New York hot spot, doesn't bode well for your pocketbook; but, your taste buds will bow down and bless you. Mine did. You're welcome little friends, you are very welcome.

Family

2010-11-25T19:28:00.003-07:00

On a holiday where one is usually surrounded by family, I was surrounded by good friends. But I can't help but think of home and snuggling the ol' family on the couch. I was with them less than a week ago for a family wedding. Spencer and Heather (Speather) got married! Here we are outside the temple with the sibs minus Natalie, though she was present in spirit.

and, well,..

We freaking LOVE each other!

Oh my goodness. It's true. And the wedding was absolutely delightful. I caught the bouquet, yo.

Friends

2010-11-14T16:30:00.004-07:00

So I have come to the conclusion, many times over, that life would absolutely suck without friends. I am so incredibly blessed to have some stellar souls as friends.

With friends in Newport, R.I. this past weekend

And a day of admiring buildings in downtown Boston: a beautifully clear day on the Freedom Trail.

To burn Boston dreams

2010-11-08T13:37:00.004-07:00

and then to throw them into the Charles River is what weekend adventures are made of.

Henry David Thoreau once said that "dreams are the touchstone of our character".

We decided on a whimsy to set our secret dreams afire and throw them into the river Saturday night. I was wrapped up in my blanket being the last to write a Boston dream. While biting the already slightly chewed up pen I contemplated on the many dreams I have dreamed. Most have come true, not all, but most.

We struggled to get the matches to work against the tight wind pulling at our coats. We huddled and formed a successful barrier that set all three dreams on fire. We let them burn long enough to see the paper's edges curl and the words of our dreams disappear. And then, with terrific shouts, we threw them into the dark night and fed them to the salty black waves below.

"The invariable mark of a dream is to see it come true"

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Here's to hoping Mr. Emerson!

On to better days

2010-11-06T11:17:00.011-06:00

‎"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you."

(from my sister Diana to my sister Natalie)

This made me smile.

Then my brother sent me a link to this video with the words, "thought you might".

It was perfect. I wanted to cry.

I've already cried a couple times this week. It has been one of the hardest weeks of teaching yet. When students tell you that you're a liar, hypocrite, racist, etc to your face and repeatedly chant that they hate your class it's kind of hard not to take it personally. Wednesday night was the climax when I honestly cried myself to sleep.

Even if this week was one of the hardest, it was also one of the loveliest.

Monday night was the Blonde Redhead show with my beloved roommates: I forgive them for not playing my favorite ("Silently") only because they were so phenomenal.

Tuesday was the calm before the storm.

On top of students hating me, it was Wednesday that I found out that my crush is dating someone else.

Thursday I talked to my mom on the phone and found out that she had cried twice this week, too. She told me that she had written me a letter that I should be expecting in the mail. I love snail mail letters! And I love her dearly. Oh, so I finally got the stipend Thursday night. It was a miracle!

Friday there were free brownies at school and I received three out of 12 projects from my students. (And for those who don't think this is good, it is.)

Friday after school I got a free massage compliments to my favorite Cajun Squirrel. It was the BEST massage I've ever had!

Friday night was Diwali celebrations with friends. Kudos to Aimee for cooking up some amazing Indian food. And happy day to having friends together for food and laughter. This was so needed for my aching soul. As were the late night Grey's Anatomy episode and chat that followed.

And now it is Saturday. The sun is coming in and out and we are lounging about eating chips and guacamole figuring out what to do next.

...from last week: romping in the leaves.

Trick or Treating

2010-10-31T05:01:00.002-06:00

We had planned to have a Halloween party on Friday during my 6th period class. (I gave my poor 3rd period class a test) 6th period we were going to all bring treats to share and play games. Well, I asked me mentor teacher if I could trick them first and run the class as if we weren't having a party. We were both pretty excited to see what would happen.

Well, 25 minutes into the period all students were still hard at work with not even a peep about our alleged party. I had been expecting a revolt and when none came I revolted. I had brought some Hint of Lime chips and I was dying to bust it open. We played UNO, ate food and generally had a lovely time. One of the students totally killed me at UNO. The worst of it was when I had to draw 16 cards. It was challenging to mask my competitive streak but when that hand was dealt, I screamed at him. Everyone thought it was pretty hilarious but only after a few moments of cautioned silence. At least I didn't bust out the colorful swears sitting on the edge of my tongue.

Missing steps

2010-10-26T19:31:00.003-06:00

I came home to a missing porch. Men were drilling it down to rubble.

And this just so happened to be the next step.

Witch Way

2010-10-24T07:26:00.003-06:00

Salem, MA near Halloween: obvious choice right? A town that is only 30 minutes away but because of the kind of season that is upon us, it took 2 hours of creeping traffic to get there. Then there was the problem of finding a place to park - thanks Salem for already making the trip a nightmare. Props.

We walked by this witch that that was tied to a pole. It was like I was looking into a mirror! Rat face makes an appearance.

Naturally, there were a lot of people in costume. Some donned on their pointy black hats that had been in storage for the past year. Others were more seriously donning them and some velvety robes as if it was their perennial choice of evening wear.

The waterfront. Quite charming and near the lovely Seaport Cafe. They've got themselves a nice spread of lobster rolls, fish & chips and onion rings.

An absolute must for capturing the moment. And if I were technologically savvy I'd be photo-shopping in some brooms and hats.

post script

2010-10-21T09:26:00.003-06:00

Just had to say, there's something worse than eating on the go and having loose strands of hair fall in one's morning milk. There is Dunkin' Donuts which dots every corner of Boston. They're even hiding in grocery stores, lurking to snag you with their festive pumpkin lattes and flavored Coolattas. What I'm really referring to is their flatbread 'healthy' choice morning sandwiches.

I ordered one today at lunch because again, I failed to give myself enough time to cook dinner last night and leave enough leftovers for today's lunch. And, my lunch is so early that even the Pizza Hut around the corner is still closed. DDs first mistake was giving me the wrong flatbread sandwich. This gave me a chance to get a sneak preview of what kind of hash they're nuking in the back. When my correct order came rolling out I could only eat half of it. It was as if I was eating an oversized toy hamburger flavored with the smell of kitchen. The slimy film coating this piece of shenanigans smeared all over my hands and lips.

So, yeah, there are worse things. And apparently going public with this information is on the top of my priority list seeing as I still have a lesson to plan and a reflection to write. I digress. Again.

I guess America really does run on Dunkin'...

Midweek evaluation

2010-10-19T18:21:00.003-06:00

After some heavy doses of complaining about Sunday night blues and other such woes of living a life that rarely gives me free 'me' time, I am blogging once again. Monday morning I moaned a good deal to my mentor teacher about how awful Sunday night is - it's like the calm before the storm. The storm being the hectic work week which isn't the 9-5, if it was I would be crying tears of joy. No, no. It is the 5 - 9 (am to pm). I'm still finding things to make me smile and laugh. Even if my meals are on the go:

Example: I eat breakfast, a bowl of cereal, while I'm blow drying my hair. Fact. I sometimes find cleans strands of hair falling into my milk. Fact and completely disgusting.

I eat lunch walking to class at UMass. Fact. One recent example, I ate some fries from the cafeteria and had a bottle of Diet Coke for dinner. Fact. And oddly delicious.

Health, exercise and good sleep have fallen by the wayside and here's hoping that no residual effects of clogged arteries, insomnia and porous bones will plague me in later years. And all because I wanted to be a teacher! Tell me you teachers out there - is it worth it? I would submit yes but though I've only been in the classroom for a little more than a month, I hope I have the grit to hold out strong till next June.

Around Us

2010-10-16T08:52:00.002-06:00

Lyrics to yet another likey like Autumnal hymn by Jonsi, lead singer of Sigur Ros. I absolutely love this song. And he's playing plenty of shows live so get a chance to snag a ticket while you can.

I see the walls and see them fall
You break through them all
I see you crawl, now you stand tall
Grow and grow till tall

In storm we scream against the stream, our eyes watering
Jump into lakes, the surface breaks
We swim underwater, and our mouths - In tune

We all want to grow with the seeds we will sow
We all want to go with the trees we will grow
We all want to know when we're all meant to go
To a place you and I - Will call home

I see forest, a treasure chest full of labyrinth
I see a door, holes in the floor
We'll breed seeds - We grow

There's songs, songs you bring to us
You pin both the wings on us
I hear it, I see you sing for us
You go tie a string around us

There's songs, songs you bring to us
You pin both the wings on us
I hear it, I see you sing for us
You go tie a string around us

We all want to grow with the seeds we will sow
We all want to go with the trees we will grow
We all want to know when we're all meant to go
To a place you and I...

We all want to grow with the seeds we will sow
We all want to know when the trees will grow
We all want to know when we're all meant to go
To a place you and I...